When Caroline did the love language survey it turned out that gifts was here secondary language. This is helpful for me to know as I didn't score on gifts. For me gifts are materialistic 'i.e. is this useful?' For Caroline gifts are symbolic and emotional. When we were first married I couldn't see the value of flowers, they are expensive and they fade so quickly. I am trying to be better with gifts, although I have bored Caroline by the fact that so many of my gifts are chocolate. Chapman says that gifts is one of the easiest love languages to learn. The thing I found most revealing in this chapter was the emphasis of our presence as a gift.
Quotes from the chapter:
'If you are to become an effective gift giver, you may have to change your attitude about money ... to invest in loving your spouse is to invest in blue-chip stocks.'
'Being there when your spouse needs you speaks loudly to one whose primary love language is receiving gifts.'
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